The Decaying Seeds of Hatred

by Breath of Sindragosa

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1.
Everything rots away and decays; Existence is marred by all these mistakes. The stench of the past suffocates me; The corpse of regret stares lifelessly. Now I watch the maggots crawl, And feast upon all my flaws Until there's nothing left to save And no one even knows my name. All the things I couldn't change Fester and boil and turn into rage All the self-loathing I feel I'll bury myself so I no longer feel. As I watch the maggots crawl And worm their way through all my flaws I know there's nothing left to save... A hollow shell without a name. Without a name. As I watch the maggots crawl And worm their way through all my flaws I know there's nothing left to save... A hollow shell without a name.
2.
All the ways it comes crashing down, It comes in waves that crash all around. I can't contemplate through the deafening sound, As the weight of it all buries me underground. Somebody help me; somebody save me... Somebody tear me from the fangs of fate. Can anyone see me? Can anyone hear me? I'm suffocating under all of this weight. I feel nothing but hate. It all looks the same. Am I the one to blame... ...for my emotional grave? I won't accept defeat cowering on my knees If I have to stand and bleed, I'll take you all with me. Somebody help me; somebody save me... Somebody tear me from the fangs of fate. Can anyone see me? Can anyone hear me? I'm suffocating under all of this weight. I feel nothing but rage. I feel nothing but hate. I feel the embrace of the cold; I feel the darkness envelope my soul. I feel nothing but hate. It all looks the same.
3.
Nothing can take away all the pain. Nothing can stop me from rotting away. I can't remain in this filthy place; Everything is tainted with the stain of my mistakes. There's no way to make it all whole once again... My mind's already gone; it breaks before it bends. Why does everything bleed? Why does everything bleed? It drains the life from me. Nothing can save what's left of my mind; My consciousness withers away on the vine. I've lost it all and sacrificed my soul Everything is drenched in the blood that I let flow There's no way to take it back or raise the dead in place; This cold, dark hell is the home that I have made. Why does everything bleed? Why does everything bleed? It drains the life from me.
4.
I've lost sight of the edge; Can't tell where I stand Will you lend me your hand? I'd like to drag you down with me. I've lost control of it all I'd rather dive than fall Will you join me? We can watch the whole world burn. I stand right on the edge; This is the end. Give me your hand; I'll drag you all down with me. I have control of it all I'd rather watch us fall Now join me So we can watch the whole world burn.
5.
Peel my skin back from my face Expose the horrors I can't erase Reveal the primal, instinctive need To watch the whole world fucking bleed. Reveal the monster in me. Reveal the monster you see. I am the face of misery I am the essence of insanity. I am the core of your rage; I am a beacon of hate. I am the beacon of hate. Reveal the monster in me. Reveal the monster you see. I am the death you seek. I am the curse you speak. Embrace all you've come to be And fall upon your humble knees. You can't escape Your morbid, filthy fate You're just like me You want to watch them bleed.
6.
Cancer 03:01
All the things we do to feel alive... All the ways we self-destruct in time... The world we know dies before our eyes; But we can't seem to see beyond our lives. Everything comes crashing down, All around...can't you hear the sound? The screams arise from underground... They're growing louder; they're all around. We suffocate the energy From all around us...can't you see? There's nowhere left for us to run; The stench of ruin fills our lungs. All the things we do to feel alive... All the ways we self-destruct in time... The world we know dies before our eyes; But we can't seem to see beyond our lives. Everything we know and love, What once was, now turned to mud... All the things we used to hate Are now the things that satiate. We drain the world of energy, Destroy it in our apathy. It falls apart right at our feet, But we're too fucking blind to see. All I see is ruin. All I see is hate. All I see is apathy. All I feel is rage. Now we reap the seeds that we have sown. Now we've lost everything that we have known. We deserve everything that we get; We're nothing but a cancer the earth does not forget. We are a cancer.
7.
Demons 06:13
Manifested nightmare from a weak and tortured mind A creation of chaos, from where sanity is redefined A consciousness that breaks when stressed to the end A demon spreads its wings as it forces will to bend. Loss of control; I will bleed no more. Death will make me whole. I will steal every one of your souls And bleed the world of every joy it has known I will drain the life out of you To feed the decaying seeds of a hatred born anew A hatred born anew; The demons come for you. This is how a mind transforms when pushed to the edge A darkness creeps into the seams as reality begins to bend Psychosis dwells within us all, it's just a step away A demon spreads its wings as it forces will to break Loss of control; I will bleed no more. Death will make me whole. I will steal every one of your souls And bleed the world of every joy it has known I will drain the life out of you To feed the decaying seeds of a hatred born anew Weep as the demons come for you.
8.
Drained 04:14
The words refuse to fall upon the page Emotionally bankrupt; I've been all but drained Please give me something to live for I'm drowning in a sea of emptiness and apathy There's no end in sight. I bleed until there's nothing left here, I'm completely empty inside Nothing left to give; no will left to fight. These demons have taken everything away from me. Taken everything away. Still the words refuse to manifest, No matter how I try....there's simply nothing left. Please give me humanity; give me a way to feel whole again Please give me the strength to see this through to the end Please, give me something to live for...I'm downing in a sea Of emptiness and apathy...there's no end in sight. Someday the words will fall upon the page Someday at last I will take the stage But for now I sit here alone in apathy The world I know has nothing here for me.
9.
Leech 04:34
You're a bloodsucking leech. You never wanted me. All you are is greed; An ambitious, lifeless breed. All the years I wasted on you All the tears I shed All the ways I destroyed myself And all the times I've bled. Once a whore, never anything more. Neverending search to fill a void inside The need to feel alive consumes your fucking life You find a soul to drain, so you can validate Live out your fantasies, ignore reality You're a bloodsucking leech. You never wanted me. All you are is greed; An ambitious, lifeless breed. All the times I tried so hard Just to prove myself to you All the times I killed myself Just to see you abandon me too. Once a whore, never anything more. Chasing all the things you think will make you whole The need to be a fucking queen of a scene you don't even know All the souls you drain just to self-validate You live in a fantasy. Fuck you, you fucking leech. Once a whore, never anything more. Tear open these scars...just to make me fucking hate you.

credits

released October 21, 2022

© and ℗ Breath of Sindragosa/Matthew "Axl" Brammer.

Written, performed, recorded, produced, mixed, and mastered by Matthew "Axl" Brammer in Laramie, Wyoming Summer-Fall 2022.

Album art by u/C0NT0RTI0NIST; additional editing by Matthew "Axl" Brammer.

Special thanks to Johnny Dove, Voice of the Soul Studios (Downers Grove, IL).

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Breath of Sindragosa Laramie, Wyoming

Solo/studio melodic deathcore project from Matthew "Axl" Brammer (Agony By Default, Silence Before the Storm, Underrot, Six Below Zero).

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